Diamonds, Cats, and Neighbors

I really am alive, I promise. I got engaged...in September. That has occupied much of my time since. Right now I'm realizing that I didn't finish this week's to-do list. I could accomplish a little tomorrow, depending on what I decide to do with my day. But the thing that has been occupying my time these past few days is a cat we found out back behind the restaurant. Poor thing was starving. I took him home and have been working to find his owner or some home for him since I can't keep him for a lot of reasons. It certainly has been a crash course in cat care. There I was, practically in the middle of the night at the grocery store buying all manner of cat supplies with a stray cat locked in my car. He's starting to get a little more padding on his little bones and he's getting more playful and more noisy with his mewing. I also discovered tonight that his fur has gotten softer. He seems happy too, which is nice. He's a really great cat, not at all mean or irritable. Today I found a home for him in the event that I don't find the real owner in the next couple days. I'm not that hopeful about finding the real owner since the cat seems to have been outside for quite a while-and this is clearly a housecat.
In my attempts to find the owner I made friends with a lady that lives on the floor below me. She invited me in and we talked for probably an hour. I saw her again today - she rescued me actually. I walked to the grocery store and while I was shopping forgot that I had to walk back and bought way too many things (including a whole rotisserie chicken and a bag of kitty litter). Well as I was attempting to walk home, she happened to be in the same shopping center and gave me a ride home. She really is very nice. Lol, so I'm glad I found the cat. I think maybe I'll invite her to tea in a few days.
For now though, its time for bed. I'll post again someday.

Life Expectancy

I found this article when I was checking my email. Basic summary, different geographic areas and different groups of people in the US have very different life expectancy rates. By very different I mean like 30 years different. I encourage you to actually read the article, it's pretty short. The fact that there are disparities does not surprise me; what I found remarkable was which groups had the higher life expectancy.

Disruption

I got sick. Strepp throat. Thanks Zac.
You see, he got sick and then I got sick. Then he got really sick and I suspected strepp throat which meant that I might have it too. So we went to the doctor together, but I waited to get on the waiting list when we found out his results. His results came back positive, so I went in next - positive. But you already knew that. Antibiotics work wonders though, and I think that come tomorrow I'll be up and about mostly like normal. The good news, that Zac doesn't like, is that since he gave it to me, I got onto antibiotics before my throat ever even got sore. Haha! Guess I shouldn't laugh, but yeah I will.
Someone in my apartment complex seems to be trying to start a garage band. For a few days now they've been playing that darned electric guitar every morning for the whole complex to hear. Then this morning, when I couldn't figure out if it was just someone playing for themselves or if they were actually trying to make a band of it, I heard singing. No, not singing, I heard screeching. Whatever it was, it was my clue that it wasn't going to end any morning soon. What kind of a rock band practices in the morning? I'm sure one of these days an old lady or someone who works all night is going to complain to the landlady.

Tidbits

There I go again, not posting. But I don't think I'm as bad as I was for a while. Tonight I'm just giving an update, here is what I have been doing:

I bought some flowers and herbs for my patio. They look sorta nice though I haven't been able to really take care of them the way I'd like to yet, so they are still just sorta living on the patio without actually being a part of it in any meaningful sense, if that makes any sense. I'm slowing changing this though. Well except that I killed the orgegano right off the bat. It was REALLY hot out. I'll need to replace it.

I went to Zac's family's house in Wisconsin for five days. It was nice, I met a lot of his extended family on both sides. The weather was mild too (compared to how VA had been). You know, Wisconsin is really pretty in the summertime. I think better of it now that I've seen it in color as opposed to my dead-of-winter-trip.

I finally got my car cleaned out, except for one bag. I should throw that stuff out tomorrow. And I (with parental funding) got my car's air conditioning fixed. At long last.

I started up babysitting again today. That is going to be a steady job probably through the school year. I've also got some steady small hours working for the people I met at work.

I've been in a continual state of trying to finish my research project from last semester. The school is not cooperating very well and at every turn something seems to go wrong. I really don't know what is going to happen with it.

Last night I baked a cake in the middle of the night.

Manna from Heaven

"Then the Lord said to Moses, 'Behold, I will rain bread from heaven for you. And the people shall go out and gather a certain quota every day, that I may test them, whether they will walk in My law or not....
"And the Lord spoke to Moses, saying, 'I have heard the complaints of the children of Israel. Speak to them, saying, 'At twilight you shall eat meat, and in the morning you shall be filled with bread. And you shall know that I am the LORD your God.''" (Exodus 16:4, 11-12 NKJV)

I am here to say, this still happens.

It all started when I walked into work one day after the previous day had been incredibly slow, knowing that if I didn't make $100, well, it would be bad. I prayed for $100. This is not characteristic of me, but it was a genuine need. That night I made $111 - twice as much as usual.

Then there was a sudden random day that my employer gave me off that I didn't need off, and rather, needed to work. But it was a new schedule and I didn't think to do anything about it this time around and even forgot I had it off. Then on a Wednesday I got a call from the woman I used to babysit for (I had just arranged to start up again for her this fall). Her babysitter was sick and she needed me to come in the next day to work ten hours. I checked my schedule, the next day was the day I had been given off. So I worked for her that day and made $100. The next night at work it was really slow. On average, I need to make $50 a night just to make it by. So I made it by.

Then on Saturday I bought furniture (and got a desk for free), mostly using my parent's money, but I ended up needing to pitch in a bit of my own money too. I dug a little too deep into the money I needed to have on hand as change when I worked. So Zac and I pull in to Taco Bell for lunch. On the ground in our parking space I saw some money. I told Zac and he thought he saw it too. Well we both saw two separate bills lying on the ground. We jump out of the car and grab them - two $50 bills. We decided that we had better tithe our discovery. That night at work I only made $12. So I still wasn't $50 richer than I needed to be, but I wasn't any poorer either.

So Tuesday was horribly slow. I went I think over an hour without getting a single table. But then I got chatting with my first table. I'll spare the details of the conversation, but they wanted to know if I would pet sit for them, their regular pet sitter was going to be traveling to Spain. I said yes, went to their house the next day. Haha, house. Their estate has multiple gardens, a pool, a barn, a cottage, and grounds that I couldn't see the end of. Oh, and I should mention that they have someone who hunts for them. I can bring friends over and swim in the pool and drink their soda. The woman gave me $20 for coming that day to learn what to do (I'm also going to be watering the flowers). I'll be making a decent amount of money for the few days they'll be gone and she's interested in having me come over after they come back home to help her with some projects. Remember I said she gave me $20? Well I wasn't expecting that. I also wasn't expecting a power outage that would close the restaurant that night.

What I have found interesting about this whole experience is that it is very clear I'm being taken care of. I'm not coming into excess money by any means. I am coming into the money I need just before I arrive at would have been a financial crisis. It reminded me of the Israelites, that they were just to pick up what they needed for that day. I would like to get to the point where I'm not living paycheck to paycheck quite so literally. And I would like to be financially secure enough that I don't have to pray for miracles. I think those are good goals. But I'm learning that I can trust God to provide for me exactly how He wants to provide for me. No way of getting me the money He wants to get me is too crazy. He might send me up a swingset for it, He might have me feeding donkeys for it, or He might just toss it on the ground in front of me. What I can know is that day to day, nothing is going to thwart His plan.

Poor

So now I'm just scraping by. I had been told I would be making more than twice as much as I actually have been making. Figures. I never make as much as I was supposed to. Even in situations where a certain pay is about guaranteed, I somehow manage to get paid less. This was not really one of those situations, but I did confirm it with the other waiters first before getting my hopes up. Yet alas, there are now too many people working there each night and fewer people coming in to eat than even just a couple weeks before I came. Reminds me of Endless Summer: "You should'a been here yesterday!" My timing is impeccibly bad. I wonder if I started being on time in my regular life if I would start coming into things like jobs and schooling and other miscellaneous things at the right time too.

I've been having fun clipping coupons and watching the grocery store for good deals. It's probably good that I'm so hard pressed for money or I wouldn't have the motivation to learn to save it. For now though, its been enough like some fun competition that I'd probably do it even if I was living some sort of cushy life. Hehe, like looking through the weekly deals while getting a pedicure and sipping champagne with a strawberry. But I don't like champagne, so I guess it is just as well that I'm poor.

I'm having this problem with thinking that I'm overdramatizing my situation. For once, I'm not. But what makes me think that I am is that I keep thinking in terms of borrowing money from my parents. For instance, I might tell my boss that I really can't go home early tonight because I needed tonight's take to go buy groceries (as was the case tonight). But then I think to myself, gosh its not like you are some destitute person like some people in this world, when the actual reality is - I am, but I just happen to have generous parents. If I really needed the money for food, I could get it from them. The change that needs to happen in my mind is, that is only a reasonable thing to ask for if I have exhausted the available options. Pleading with my boss is one of my options and there is nothing wrong or melodramatic about portraying my situation as one of needing that money for my sustenance. The availability of charity does not make the need for the paycheck any less real.

But if charity is available, it can know that I have the most use for Target gift cards and an ironing board.

What I Left

"If your right eye causes you to sin, pluck it out and cast it from you; for it is more profitable for you that one of your members perish, than for your whole body to be cast into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and cast it from you; for it is more profitable for you that one of your members perish, than for your whole body to be cast into hell."
Matthew 5:29-30 NKJV

"For I was envious of the boastful, when I saw the prosperity of the wicked. For there are no pangs in their death, but their strength is firm...Therefore pride serves as their necklace; violence covers them like a garment...They scoff and speak wickedly concerning oppression; they speak loftily.
When I thought how to understand this, it was too painful for me- Until I went into the sanctuary of God; then I understood their end. Surely You set them in slippery places; you cast them down to destruction. Oh, how they are brought to desolation, as in a moment! They are utterly consumed with terrors. As a dream when one awakes, so Lord, when You awake, you shall despise their image. Thus my heart was grieved, and I was vexed in my mind. I was so foolish and ignorant; I was like a beast before You. Nevertheless I am continually with You; you hold me by my right hand. You will guide me with Your counsel, and afterward receive me to glory."
Psalm 73, excerpts NKJV

Thank you, Dr. Bates, you brought me back to the only Refuge.